In loving memory of Wendy

Dear Friends,

Wendy passed away at about 10am this morning.  I am sorry for having taken this long to write this posting as I have just come home now. 

This morning, the adopter managed to feed Wendy some food.  She ate.  Then, to everyone’s delight, she defecated.  We all cheered. 

She probably wanted to go off “clean”, hence she emptied her bowels.  I know many humans do that before they go. 

The adopter went off to market, and when he returned, Wendy’s twitching had stopped and she was not breathing anymore.  But, her body was still warm.  It was just a matter of about half an hour that he was gone. 

Wendy probably did not want any of us to see her going, so she chose to go after a good meal, and after she had cleaned herself. 

Yesterday, my friend told me it could be a “sudden revival” before death (Wendy’s sudden improvement from her lateral recumbency and non-eating state).  And I knew he could be right.  Many humans do that, I’ve seen a few cases.  But I preferred to keep my hopes high and ride on optimism. 

On hindsight, Wendy probably wanted to give me a chance to feed her, care for her and look after her before she passed on.  We probably have a strong karmic connection that had to be completed in this lifetime, together. 

In the past two weeks, I was under severe pressure to give the order to have her euthanised.  In my moments of weakness, I was “this close” to succumbing, but I knew that even if I had agreed and when the time came, I would have stopped the vet and said “No”.  It is not about religious beliefs or even values.  It is simply because I felt I had no right to give the order to end anyone’s life.  It is not my calling.  It is that person’s (animal’s) calling, or the universe’s.  It is not mine.  

Life is to be respected, not destroyed or terminated, no matter how hopeless it may seem to be.  This is just my personal view, which I have never claimed to be “the” right view.     

I want to thank everyone who had lent their support during this crucial period.  Some of you were there for me, even though you did not quite agree with our decision of saying “no” to euthanasia.  Yet, you offered helpful advice.  You even came forth to help out physically.  Thank you for respecting our decision.  Thank you, for respecting Wendy’s decision.   

There are two people I want to thank for giving me their very strong and unbending support as I went through this extremely trying period.  First, it’s Wani, of MDDB, who shared with me her experience in dealing with dying dogs, and her strong conviction about no-euthanasia, gleaned from her Hindu upbringing.  Second, and no less, is Wendy’s adopter, who told me in no uncertain terms that I could direct all criticisms to him, and that he will answer them on my behalf should I find it too hard to bear.  I must also not forget those who have written very supportive comments in response to my postings on Wendy.  Some are strangers, and I can’t thank you all personally, but please know that your support is priceless and is most appreciated.   

There was actually only two vicious emails directed at me, and both were sent by the same person.  A few fellow animal-loving friends chose to keep their silence, which was probably their show of disagreement over our decision.  I heard them too.  We respect each other for our difference in opinion.  That ought to be the way.  Harsh words just don’t help.  We know so little about life, so, how can we claim who is right and who is wrong?       

The first thing I did this morning when I received news of Wendy’s passing was to go to Public Bank, and make our pledged donation to the poor dog (suffering from burns) who is now being treated by MDDB.  The donation is made in loving memory of Wendy.  It is from all of us at AnimalCare.  We transfer the merits accrued from this deed to Wendy, and wish her a safe journey to her next existence, in a much better and happier plane.

Wendy has taught us, in this short time, the meaning of strength, endurance and acceptance.  She accepted her illness bravely, and endured all the discomfort calmly.  She hardly complained of any pain throughout her illness, never yelping or whining in agony.  She was always an icon of peace and serenity, quietly accepting what is, and letting nature take its course. 

Wendy, we salute you with our deepest and heartfelt respect.  You are an inspiration to us all.   

Wendy decided to go today, after giving me the opportunity to look after her fully for 3 whole days.  I thank Wendy, from the bottom of my heart for according me this priceless experience, and for giving me the joy of seeing her well again.  In these 3 days, Wendy received 24 hours non-stop loving-kindness chanting, and was in a pleasant environment surrounded by green grass, fresh air and the beauty of nature. 

Walk on now, brave one, with hope in your heart, knowing you are loved and respected by all of us who wish you well in your next journey through life.  Hold your head up high, and walk on… 

And please continue to guide us from where you are now. 

Goodbye, but only for now, dear sweet Wendy. 

We will meet again on Rainbow Bridge. 

Photo taken on 15th Dec 2009
When you walk through a storm hold your head up high
And don’t be afraid of the dark.
At the end of a storm is a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of a lark.
Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Tho’ your dreams be tossed and blown.
Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart
And you’ll never walk alone,
You’ll never, ever walk alone.
Wendy passed away on 12th February, 2010,
after a brave 3-week battle with canine distemper. 

Wendy’s final resting place
1.23pm

14 comments to In loving memory of Wendy

  • Li Lian

    Dearest Wendy,

    Your life story has taught us so much about life itself. Your determination to stick to the end was amazing. I will always remember you and as I shed tears, I am wondering if I should. Oh well, you have truly touched my heart!

    I wish you love wherever you maybe and that the angels will always be with you as they were when you lived on earth. You are truly blessed!

    Goodbye for now…

  • Li Lian

    Dearest Kah Yein,

    Thank you for your dedication and commitment towards Wendy until the very end. It wasn't easy and you were as determined as Wendy. The both of you were a perfect match :-) I agree that the both of you have a strong karmic connection that had to be completed in this lifetime, together. You have also taught us a lot about life. Should you intend to write another book, I hope to read about this life lesson about you and Wendy in it.

    I never knew about "sudden revival" before death. I just checked my notes on my previous cat who passed away in 2006 and found that it also happened to her.

    Wendy fought to the very end of her life and it is also the very end of the chinese calendar. It is as if she knew she had to leave before the chinese new year started or it was meant to be that way. Whatever it may be, it seems to signify a good ending and also a good beginning.

    Everything was an arrangement by the heavens and yes, it is done.

  • R.I.P wendy..

    saya ikut cerita Wendy.

    mungkin ini yang terbaik buat wendy.

  • Anonymous

    Rest in Peace, Wendy girl, I am thankful, for your death is an honorable one…

    loves
    joogyee

  • Anonymous

    Dearest Wendy,

    We thank God for the great priviledge of having known a beautiful and great lady – you. You taught us love and resilience. You touched all our hearts and we learned the joy of giving freely and selflessly, without a price tag attached. We cry now not because of your death as your earthly suffering is finally gone and you are now whole and in Heaven, but that because we will miss you. You stood for something important that mankind has forgotten and that is kindness, compassion and mercy. Thank you, darling Wendy, may you rest in peace.

    Dearest Kah Yein,

    Thank you so much for rescuing Wendy and steadfastly caring for Wendy till the end amidst so much discouragements and obstacles placed in your path (and your team's), and your great generosity in sharing everything (your hopes, your frustrations, pain, steadfastness and strength), allowing us to learn so many important life lessons.

    We have gained so much. You have successfully taught us what life is all about. You taught us what good stewardship over God's creatures is all about.

    Thank you so much, and God bless you always.

  • Li Lian

    Dear Anonymous (above),

    Every word you have written above is truly well said.

    Thank you.

  • Lois Lane

    Knowing how sick she was and following each of her updates did not make her passing any easier to bear.

    I always find death painful to deal with, but I know that Wendy is now free from her suffering and she left knowing how much she is loved by a lot of us.

    I cried (again!) when I saw that photo of you with Wendy in your arms taken in Dec. Please be strong, Kah Yein. I think Wendy would have wanted that.

  • Straydog

    The Universe and Wendy have decided. Goodbye Wendy… you are now safe with your friends in the astral world. Om.

  • Anonymous

    Dear Kah Yein,

    thank you for being there for Wendy and allowing her the dignity of dying on her own.

    In this short time, I believe Wendy has left a deep mark in many hearts.

    She would have just been another unfortunate stray if you had not stood by her and made many "see" her through your eyes and words.

    At least she died knowing that there were people who loved her……and that not all humans were cruel and cold.

    W

  • A beautiful closing of Wendy's chapter as a dog.
    Your paths had crossed, and will surely cross again :-)

  • ervina

    RIP Wendy :'(
    you will be remembered for your courage
    and your strong spirit..
    you're in a happier place girl –
    waiting for those who have helped you,
    tail wagging and barking happily :)

  • Jacinta

    Hi Kah Yein,

    I was hoping against hope that Wendy would get better, and I know that every little detail about her eating again and poo-ing made my heart feel lighter after a hard days work.Working with animals is always such a bittersweet experience.

    Regardless of the negativity that surrounds us, financial constraints and the almost constant loss of lives – I hope that you and other animal rescuers will keep up the important work you do for the animals. We may not always see eye-to-eye as animal guardians in our own right, but that's not important – what matters is that our intent is pure and selfless.

    You are probably feeling shattered and down right now, but believe you me – tomorrow morning there will be yet another animal on your doorstep, asking the world of you. And I hope you continue to give the world to these animals, as you have done for Wendy.

    If there's anything I can do to help you in my capacity, please let me know.

    Love,
    Jacinta

  • Thank you, everyone. I had to get up on my feet almost immediately as I had the six kittens to look after right after Wendy's passing. Wendy will always be very special to all of us. She displayed a strength so great, I am deeply humbled and awed. We learn so much from the animals.